The indicted Assembly Speaker, Scott "Don't Call Me Scooter" Jensen presented his witness list for his upcoming criminal trial. The list is posted and reviewed by Xoff, Tommy, Klauser on witness list, too .
Here are the Top Ten reasons why Jensen presents a witness list of luminaries from Wisconsin politics from the 1980's and 1990's?
10. "I'm going down and I am going to take everyone of of these sonsofbitches with me."
9. "The prosecutor will be overloaded with this list and throw in the towel."
8. "The judge will accept a prosecution motion to strike these witnesses; I appeal claiming I did not get a fair trial without my witnesses and get off."
7. "If I can get half of the list on to the witness stand, I create a three-ring circus, ala O.J. Simpson and get off Scott free. (heheh)."
6. "Most of these guys are either as guilty as me or at least I can imply it; they will be afraid to testify and I will look good."
5. "It will be good to see Tommy and Klauser, they don't answer my phone calls anymore."
4. "They all like me and will make great character witnesses."
3. "With this witness list, the trial is sure to have Court TV coverage, I write the book and make a fortune. I never believed in 'conceal and carry' anyway."
2. "The rest are decoys, I really want Prosser; with a Supreme Court Judge as a witness, I can really screw up the appeal process."
1. "All of the above."
I didn't know who said it first - - maybe it was you? - - but to me, the real Scooter will always be Phil Rizzuto, not Jensen or Libby - - even if the real Scooter is selling his memorabilia.
Posted by: JIm Rowen | February 03, 2006 at 09:21 PM
Jim, I played with it at:
http://www.waxingamerica.com/2005/11/scooter_jensen.html#comments
Thats the problem with distinctive nicknames- a few indicted guys can ruin a good monicker.
Posted by: Paul | February 03, 2006 at 09:39 PM
So thank goodness that there are no felonious government officials nicknamed "Minnie," though it would warm my heart if I were to read one day that Dick "Minnie" Cheney or Donald "Minnie" Rumsfeld were headed for the perp walk.
Posted by: JIm Rowen | February 03, 2006 at 10:15 PM